Panic Time!

I'm panicking.Yes,I am panicking.

My heart is jackrabbit-ing in my chest and my head keeps coming up with the proper song to describe this feeling.I feel constricted.Like there's not enough space inside of me to press this swelling.This swelling called "panic".

I'm leaving.That's it.
It's like boarding school all over again.Sending me away,and coming back for the holidays.I'm going away.For real.

I suppose I should get used to it.And I know I will,soon because I'm an easy adapter.But the thought of leaving has always been unnerving to me.
'Leaving' means a lot of things.

Maybe it's not so much as leaving as the location where I am to be sent.I mean,KB wasn't a big deal since I was still in the same state as home but Selangor is a whole different deal.That's half a day away from home.

Being away stings on the first few weeks,I know.
I've experienced it before.Boarding school for a year,remember??

Back then I was just an ignorant child.I found Qie and Wa and that makes it whole lot better.I built a family of my own and that was fine.

Now? I don't think so.
I've grown up a little(just a little) and it all will be a bit harder than before.But I can get through this.I lived a year through hostel,I can do better.
I may not meet another Faqihah but it's not necessary.

I can do this.


I just need to hash out a routine and then I'll be fine.
It's just like when Mom and Dad went for Hajji and all the crap that befell us on their absence.Just like that.

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