Oh GOD...I mean it when I said I had forget him already..Didn't I?? I mean,I was super duper dead serious when I said to her that,"I had forget all about him in these few weeks,I can live my life normally now",right?? So tell me...Why the shitty bloody hell that my heart skipped a beat when I saw him yesterday at Grandma's house in TM??!!!! And not only that,after it skipped a beat,it began to beat faster than ever!!! GUWAAAAAAAHHHH~~~~~~!!!!!!!!!!!!! XO Dude,it was just a glance!! He glanced at me at the same time I noticed his appearance that evening!!! It was just a bloody glance,DAMMIT~~!!!!!!! DX LUCHIA,I NEED YOU RITE NOW~~~~!!!!!!!!!!! -screams loudly to the top of her lungs in her mind till her ears droped from her head-
Nanairo no kaze ni fukarete tooi misaki wo mezashiteta yoakemae kikoeta melody sore wa tottemo natsukashii uta higashi no sora eto habatakuu torii tachi saa takaraji manii yukeru
Ok,that was weird.Why did this song suddenly came up?? Ah,I know! maybe because I was screaming for Luchia,then this song came up because Luchia loves this song and she sings it all night! XDD (hahahahaha~~!!!) Uhh..Sorry,sorry..I was a bit outta control there.. T__T now,let's get to real business..As I said,I actually met him yesterday on Hari Raya Aidil Adha at grandma's house.I donno why but that got me almost gasping for air.My heart started to beat really fast,and I scolded myself like this..
Me 1:dude,get a hold of yourself!! U said that he had already made it past ur life!! Get on with it,dummy!!!
Me 2:I know! But..He saw me there..can u tell me why did our heart skipped a beat there??!! HUH??!!
Me 1:Dude,a beat or two beat,he cheated on us! Don't u remember??!!
Me 2:well..yeah,that is true..I DO hate him,and so do we..But still...
Me 1:don't u 'but' me! Remember the tears we flowed that night,and the unbearable pain..Good thing we made a wise decision to ask for Luchia's help! if not,we would've been worse!
Me 2:but we loved him! remember that also! We loved him for nine bloody years!! That feeling couldn't just disappear easily!!
Me 1:Oh yeah??!! well,it DID disappeared! But then u had to get it back to motion! And we 'LOVED' him,that word is in past tense! Hell yeah,we did loved him,but that was it used to be.Past doesn't make any sense to us now.
Me 2:.......I'm sorry..I know that it was painful..Those words of forgetting him..Maybe we DID forget him,but just for a while..
Me 1:I know,the moment we saw him made us realized that we had only forgetting him for a little while but not thoroughly..We NEED to erase him..Permanently..
Me 2:Permanently..?? I..I don't know..
Me 1:don't be hesitating now,u KNOW we need to do this for the sake of us.U don't want to be hurted again,right??
Me 1:No! Of course,not! The pain is too much painful,I can't let we through that again! Never!
Me 2:Then listen to me and do what I say,we HAVE to find a way to forget him permanently.
Me 1:.........................
Then I fell asleep,I donno why but sometimes it gets so tiring when I held a discussion with myself.It felt like I used up all my energy for each halves of me.It was so tiring,I fell asleep the second I regained my usual oneself.Man,seriously...I don't get the other half of me,what the hell was she(me) thinking?? After all the bloody pain,she(me) couldn't seriously say that she(me) still have feelings for that jerk! -sigh heavily-
Oh God,help me... -___-
Dude, you can never forget him PERMANENTLY. U'll never will. The thing you can do is erase your feelings toward him. Just love him as a cuzzy, not more than that. I know this will take a damn long time, but believe me it will work~ You may think that when you saw him, you'll feel nervous or your heart will skip a beat, but sooner or later the feelings will gone naturally (the main damn way to change your feelings to a cuzzy's love feeling is you need to bloody face him. NOT AVOIDING HIS SORRY ASS). Well, you may think I all I can do is say, but you can trust me this time because I've gone through this too.
ReplyDeleteunfortunately,that way is too late.He had been in my heart for nine years,my love for him can never be the same anymore.
ReplyDeletewho is him?
ReplyDeleteuhh..identity is not required.. T__T|||
ReplyDelete