AkImA No NiKkI

Hey.Sorry for not posting so long.It's been like,what,a month? since I last posted,but never mind.I was busy anyway,the trial for PMR is coming soon so all of us 3rd years have to struggle.Today,is one of those days where I keep wishing how good it would be if I could just extinguish my existence or in other words;die. I know I'm not the most obedient nor perfect daughter ,but I never disobeyed my parents..Always tried to satisfy their wishes upon myself eventhough agaisnt my very own will. I tried..Really.. I really..Tried... But I want to have some private things on my own too..Even just a little room of privacy,I want that room.. Now I'm currently filling the whole pages of a green diary which Faqie gave me 2 years ago.I wanted it to be full..Full of the days that I wrote in it,so that when I am with her again,I want her to know every single detail of my life here.. I want her to know that I missed her on every single pages in that diary.. I really,seriousl...

Urgh...It hurts more than I expected it to be...Well,I'm not suprised that it came to me earlier than it should but,it's a bit too ,early.. All was going well until he sent me that stupid request .All was running smoothly with each's lives normally until that stupid request he made that made me feel so utterly stupid for even giving a  thought of him being my legally coming-to-be boyfriend . We just achieved a mutual agreement last nite,and this morning he acts like he's already my boyfriend! Besides,we just knew each other this year!! (>^<) "Once bitten,twice shy"- I should've known..This idiom has always been in my most favourited idioms of all amongst many things I love in Eng.subject.And I acknowledge it's meaning very well... Now I feel so stupid ...Stupid for failing in something that I acknowledge very well.. I should've seen it coming,but then,what can I say? I'm stupid ..Aren't I?? I've experienced this ...