AkImA No NiKkI

Tomorrow is Eid ul Fitri. And here I am,bawling my eyes out 2 days in a row. For those who do not want to know,please close this blog.The others who stayed,you are welcomed. I know very well I shouldn't dwell on this.It's pathetic.It's pitiful.Syaf would probably be angry with me after this ,if he stayed,that is .He once told me that I think through things too much.Well,I tried to do what he said,y'noe. I tried. And thanks to him that I'd been able to hold out this long.But it's too much,y'noe? As time goes by,the pain grew. Last night,I tried to swallow 'em down like I always do but I couldn't.Instead of relieving the "burns" inside,it made it more painful. It took me all my concentration to keep calm while in front of my family.Eventhough at the time,I feel as though my insides were steels on fire. And because my focus were slowly fading,I accidentally blurted out that one sentence. "Well,there has to be at least ONE u

Posting again. A lot have been happening lately and I haven't had the chance to write in my diary yet. I miss writing. It takes my mind off things.It lets me relax,y'noe? Nee-san and Nii-chan's problems are most likely to be solved now although I dunno how it will turn out in the end. I did my part,the rest depends on how the both of them handle the situation.Thou I do hope that they will be together again. I love Nee-san.I love Nii-chan too. If one is hurt,then so will the other one .And I don't want either of that to happen. Soredemo,I would like to sit by their side and watch out for them. All this time,I've always had this attitude of 'I-don't-give-a-damn' for people's opinions towards me.I developed that feeling since I was 12. I never kept my appearance because I believe it does not matter. One's personality are not seen by his/her looks but his/her actions. So are my manners in speech.I don't talk much in my group consi

Why are our English studies consists mostly about "love" ?? Especially Literature. Don't they have something else to press on? For instance," family "?? Or " friendship "?? I mean,both of the subjects is "love" too but a more specific one! More moral,I should say. "Love" between a guy and a girl is too...... awkward to talk about in studies,don't you think? Blergh . xPP In the poem "He Had Such Quiet Eyes" that we fairly know in Form 4 Literature,it tells us about the danger in falling in love with the wrong guy.Sir asked us a question ,do you think it is a good advice? most of us answered yes ,and so did I. My answer was that so as to not get a broken-heart because falling in love,doesn't always end with a happy ending. [you can't seriously think ALL relationships have happy endings,don't you??] If we fell in love but it didn't go as expected,we would be hurt. Which is why we have