surprise

Faqie called tonight.Around 9.15 p.m.Frankly I was surprised.My queen and my princess,they were never one to call me first.Well,sometimes,but rarely.


I was a bit late,picking up.


The conversation went a bit....awkward.
I mean,there were silences.Like we're both at lost for words.I...We never experienced that before.Silence,that is.
I'll start where we continued after three long silences.


Me:.........oh yeah,when I went back to SMIP..Azwa,looked a bit,different.I mean,after 3 years,she looked...Different.....Except that she's way more beautiful of course.


Faqie:well yeah,that brat...Your beloved Azwa had turned quite a mature lady.I suppose you could say that 'cause you haven't been with us for the past 2 years.She could control her temper a little bit,I guess.And she doesn't go ballistic over something irrational anymore. *chuckles*


Me:wow,really? that is a big difference.*sigh* I miss my stubborn,childish,homey Azwa.Though I'd keep that beauty.heheh~ (geh,no matter how old she is,she will always be beautiful to me.)


Faqie:*laughs* hey,she still have that you know.Childish-ness.And stubborn still sticks,sometimes.When she have problems she would run to me and nag about it.You should see her nagging,she'll get your ears deaf.*laughs*


Me:*laughs*  well,glad to hear that.I dunno,she seems different,from the inside I mean.When I came,she looks...Cold.


Faqie:I dunno 'bout that.


Here,another silence.I was thinking about what to talk about.But I waited for her,'cause I'm afraid....That if I keep talking,she would hide something from us.
Actually,when she said that Azwa had changed into a more mature lady,I felt....At lost.
Like something that was mine was snatched.No,more like something I lost.
Luckily,she started first.


Faqie:.........You know....remember about Syah..?


Me:Syah? Oh,you mean your cousin's friend who you abruptly chose to be in relationship with and not telling us a thing? yeah I remember him,what 'bout him?


Faqie:*nervous laugh* y,yeah..I think I wanna concentrate on my study next year.I wanna give it my best for our next two years before SPM.So..Do u think it's better if I break up with him?


Me:*chuckles* Faqie,it's your call.Tho I'd think it's the ultimate best if you break up with him if you're really wanna improve your study.But I'll let you know,whatever decisions you make,Azwa and I will support you.As your 'papa' and 'mama',whatever your call,be it bad or good,we got your back and support you the whole way thoroughly.If it's bad,we'll fix it,together.And if it's good,we'll celebrate.Okay? *grins*


Faqie:Okay...


And here,we stop.
The next subject was about Dayah.How we missed her,the way she always cries over trivial things,how we loved to piss her off..I suppose she's happy where she is and no objections to that.


But she will always be a part of this 'family',whether she was aware of that or not.
She'll always be our little crybaby.


When Faqie and I were about to hang up the phone,after we said goodnight,I stopped for a while,thinking should I utter the words I said every time before hangs up? "I love you"..
I was about to open my mouth,but she had already hanged up.(I meant hanged the phone up.)


I thought maybe I could text her instead,but she said she was sleepy and wanted to go to sleep.
and I thought maybe I shouldn't..Faqie's one to go ballistic if she had her sleep interfered.I thought about it over and over,should I text it or shouldn't I??


Then while I was making a fool outta myself,time flies.An hour later,I chose to not text her.It's not like I don't love her or Azwa anymore,I was afraid that she might thinks that I don't love them anymore if I left that word out.It was a daily thing for us to say that after a "goodbye" or a "goodnight".


So it did.I didn't say or text her "I love you,princess" like I usually does tonight.
................................
I feel guilty. -______-|||||

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