Breakdown

I'm getting more breakdown as I get older.That's definitely going to be a big issue.Namely,a big pain in the ass in the future.Urgh.
Okay,it's bullshit,I get it,but it's not like I can help the damn thing.When it comes,it comes.I didn't expect the dams to break that easily nor that suddenly.
Should I warrant a warning to inner 'me's to,next time,give me a freaking heads up if they want to issue a big BREAKDOWN!
Fuck,guys! I thought we're in this together!

we are.
we just thought that you'd stop us,what with covering ourselves with the presence of people.

yeah,good that you know.Can't you just postpone it to some other time? You know I have to still wear the mask.Until we're alone.You scared her out,guys.

we can't.You were breaking.If we'd let you,others will get affected.This isn't the most normal shit we had,man.
we had to be on guard,more than usual.

*exhales*
This's what I get for consulting my alter egos concerning my sanity's safekeeping.*groans* Just because they're me's,doesn't mean they can pull any rope in my fucking brain whenever they want.I created them for a reason,and it is NOT to scare people who is lending us a big help.
Cool it,guys,alright? They're normal people.They don't understand us.

yeah.but you should cool it,too.you're reaching your limits.

*sigh* I know.The depression's heavier than I thought it'd be.I'd expected it to turn up,but I didn't guess how much.About the breakdown...It's probably the tensions,finally getting to me.Not seeing my family at home...Well,it punches harder in the gut than I thought it would.
I miss Mom and Dad.
I miss Onee-san.
I miss Mia and the kids.
Dang I even miss the freaking rabbits which we have not even named yet.
......
I miss my family.

yeah,we know.
we do,too.

[me and Muzakkir]

[Mukhlis,Mom,Mia,& Dad]