I want to be there for you,but I'm not sure you'd want me to.

Hey people.
Say,if someone asked you to choose between the person you love and your family,who would you choose?
Every person is different in his/her own way.And I without doubt would choose my family.I understand his decision,and as he requested,I respected it.
I knew the news would reach me eventually and honestly,it was no surprise.I had predicted this outcome and tho I didn't want it to happen,it wasn't mine to decide.All I could do,is just pray and accept them.

 I'm sorry for Nee-san's pain.
I think I sort of...Understand,the pain of first true love.I had mine when I was young but I didn't had the clean break situation like Nee-san.
And for that,I thank God.She met a better guy for her first love.
I want to help her but I wasn't sure that she'd want it.Time passed,and I no longer have clear readings of her mind.
I really..want to be there for her..But I'm afraid that she won't accept my presence.
Even so,I want her to know that no matter what happens,nothing changes.

 I believe in her.
She is the strongest person I've ever met in my life and I believe in her strength.
But that fear still exists.
I'm scared for her.I'm scared that she won't make it.
That she couldn't pull through.
I'm sure that time will help,but how long?
Between wanting her to have more experience and to protect her from whatever is hurting her,I was trapped.

 She with her love story.And I with mine.
I think I'll apologize.
I have hurt him too much and truth be told,I feel guilty.
Guilty as hell.
If he is willing to forgive me,then that is more than I could ask.

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