AkImA No NiKkI

2 years from now,maybe I won't be single anymore.Thou that fact scares me a bit,but this would be a new experience for me and a new chapter in My LiFe.I thought about choices I have in choosing paths that will create a new branch in my road of life ,and I doubt that there won't be any obstacles,cuz there always will be.  [preparing for obstacle]  I asked him ; 2 years,until SPM is over,could you wait? and relieved when having the definite answer although he was playing quite dumb and all. Like,saying uncertain statements.For example ,"maybe" or "perhaps". That's the part I hate about him the most,but still,he have advantages and disadvantages.Everyone does.Even so, I can't tolerate uncertanties at this point.(-____-) He asked about the 3rd guy.I said, what about him? he sounded so grumpy it made him look like he was jealous or something.He said that the 3rd guy have been asking about me from him and eventhough he was angr...

Agh~~!!!!! Huhuhuhuhu....Sob..Sob.. [please forgive this moment of incovenience for the writer is having a serious brain problem.tit.] I can't take it anymore...I seriously can't take this to further consideration... [note:please imagine the writer as a gloomy dark object hugging her knees to her face at a special place in the room called as "Mr.Corner".]   Here's the deal - 4 guys. 1:My former childhood classmate whom I already rejected 3 years ago.Done.But the fact that he's informing who has a crush on me and who doesn't is making me a little bit awkward.But still,he's my bestfriend. 2:A classmate.Just confessed three days ago through a simple text message.Half-replied=Half-done.Thou I like him because he has this cute face but his cowardish acts literally pisses me off. 3:Not a classmate but a boy next class.I think I see the hints that shows he's trying to hit on me but I can't bring myself to believe it.Somehow.Thou he is not as cu...

Ugh,I can't deny that stuffs like this happens regularly for teenagers but does it really HAVE to be so...So recent ?? Including this year,five guys had been said to have a huge crush on me  [which I reluctantly refuse to believe until now] (T^T) I don't NEED to be in love nor to enjoy this time of youth.I have princips.Which is to obey if I don't want to be strangled by mom.I can't have boyfriends before I turned 18,after SPM,I can have as many lovers as I want [like mom said it]. I don't originally believe if a friend told me that some guy had a crush on me until the guy himself have the courage to confront me and confess. .I like...the straightforward type,but not too straightforward that he didn't think before he talks. Besides,this guy,who had a crush on me is currently the same age as I am and apparently a friend of mine who is a girl had the same crush on him ! This calls for a psychiatrist~~!!!! xxOO Is this...A love triangle..?? Agh~~!!!!...

God...Tonight I cried again.Not the usual cry,the really sobbing cry .And it's all because of a stupid fake rumour.No,the rumour's not about me..It's about.. Faqie.. I was onlining as usual tonight,because tomorrow's the weekend and evnthough I have classes tomorrow,I don't give a crap cuz I missed my blog so much..I had to restrain myself from touching the laptop and broadband the whole school-days or my mom will have my allowance cut.Then this guy from the same class as Faqie suddenly pop-chatted me,I chatted with him for about 1-3 minutes and then,he suddenly told me that Faqie got herself a boyfriend .Well,I guess you could tell what will I do next. I PISS OFF. I was seriously pissed off,I kept throwing shit words at the guy and I don't give a damn crap if the words doesn't even make any sense.I'm not pissed off because she got a boyfriend earlier than what we promised,but it's because that I got scared .I got so SHITTY SCARED .I keep reme...

"Past" refers to everything that has been done ."Future" refers to everything that is yet to come ."Now" refers to everything that is happening at the very moment.What happened in the past?? and what WILL happen in the future?? **** what was the thing you remembered the most about your past? I silenced myself.Afraid to speak for chances of incorrect informations are inevitably high. He gave me options.Simple options. was it happiness? or sadness? or love? or loneliness? or fear? I thought..If I were to rewind back to my past ,or more likely,my childhood...There is nothing to be remembered actually.My childhood was,needless to say...Boring and sorrowful.I don't remember what happened on my birthdays,in fact I don't even remember any of them.I don't remember big love confessions except for some kid sending me love letters nor do I remember being given the unseparable love from my parents. But I do remember,the days when I see only tea...

"Ryu...Is it okay for you to come back? I mean,don't you have family matters to attend to in South Korea?" she turned her sight to him,the protector of their family,hoping for something that could make her happy..His answer though,never seemed to fail her."Baby,I AM attending family matters.Right here.Right now." his smile overwhelms her.The smile that she and their daughters have been missing for 2 years.The smile that she dreamed every night that made her cried,just to see that one smile once more.The smile that is now on her very eyes,wrapping her in great warmth..The smile from her one and only love ,Hanamichi Ryushi .... "yeah..You are..Thanks Ryu.." "for what? I didn't even gave you the present I promised when I came back!" she chuckles.He still have his natural way of weird goofy humours,that can always make her laugh. "for coming back,silly! and you better find me a present soon,or I'll ask for a divorce!" "w...

Seriously,I think she's killing us all.(T____T) In our house,nobody smokes.Dad doesn't smoke,he did,but stopped many years ago (Thank God).Mom? Dude,try saying that if you have a death wish!! IMPOSSIBLEEEEE ~~~~!!!!!!. No other are questioned as other than mom and dad,all of us hate cigarettes.Which means we liberately hate grandma who's smoking day and night poofing the goddamn smokes in the house!! sooner or later I'm gonna find out that I have lung cancer because of the goddamn smokes....(-^-).....It feels like my stomach's full of smokes instead of food.-____-|||| Besides,I hate the goddamn smell!! It's burning a hole in my nostrils man!!!! xPPPP Seriously,if my coming-to-be husband ever smoke,I will nonetheless immediately dump him.Not only coming-to-be husband,my boyfriend,if he ever touch a single cigarette means bye-bye me and our so romantic relationship.ha! ha! ha! Man,I love it when I'm evil...(^^)

Ah....You know,there are times when you feel like you were seeing flowers and beautiful butterflies floating around your hair..And you feel your cheeks blushing to their maximums like donuts...Then you can't help to feel so hilariously funny and you laughed so genuinely..Especially when you are reading something you find very amusing and heart-warming....It's like,confronting your first love and he/she accepted to go out with you....Damn,feels like the whole world is spinning and your head gets so dizzy with fluffy flashy bunny stuffs...hahahaha.....Hey,you know what? I love books .I so love them so very much.god if I can marry a book I love so damn much I would.Maybe I'd be marrying a book at 13 if that was possible.I love my world where there are books and my beloved people ONLY .Oh books,you are my Juliet for I am the Romeo~~~ XXXX33333 But then...There are just times when you feel the world is coming to a real shit end. YOUR world...The ground where you stand sha...

It has almost been a week since mom,dad and Muzakkir left for Umrah at Mekah.And it gas also been a week since mom paid grandma (mom's side of the family) and her two friends to actually BABYSIT us for two whole weeks on their absence.GOD,you don't know how this creates a whole new hell for me,she and us were never an item.Ever since we (me n sis)  were little,we hated going back to Pasir Puteh,to mom's side of the family,but we put up with it because we wanted mom to be happy.Like it or not,she's our mom's mom.But we didn't like her,because it seems to us that she never really cared for us as her grandchidlren because every time we go back to PP she always ask mom for money.I witnessed these ever since I was little,and until now I still remembered it clearly. That's one thing.Another is,of all the new problems that I had to encounter,why does it HAD to be a meeting with HIM ????!!!!! Today,my cousin sis got married and we went there as family.I forgot ...